THE WAY OF SUN TZU NARROW PASSES
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10.8. With regard to NARROW PASSES, if you can occupy them first, let them be strongly garrisoned and await the advent of the enemy.
10.9. Should the army forestall you in occupying a pass, do not go after him if the pass is fully garrisoned, but only if it is weakly garrisoned.
10.9. Should the army forestall you in occupying a pass, do not go after him if the pass is fully garrisoned, but only if it is weakly garrisoned.
These lines often sneak into our lives, causing immense trouble, yet many remain oblivious to their existence beyond the confines of a book. Everyday encounters with narrow passages manifest in various forms: the checkout aisles in shopping centres, the daily commute by trains and buses, traffic jams during the hustle to work, classrooms filled with students, unforgiving timetables and deadlines, awkward pauses in conversations, elevators, and escalators, household appliances like fridges and clothes, and of course, the omnipresent and indispensable smartphone. Checkouts crammed with impulsive or last-minute purchases exemplify the heavily fortified "narrow pass."
Although initially intended to denote a geographical feature, relating the concept of narrow passes to our daily lives poses a greater challenge. We aren't inherently wired to extrapolate ancient geographical ideas to modern situations. It requires unwavering commitment, perseverance, and patience.
Time and patience are indeed prerequisites for mastering the art of navigating these treacherous paths. However, once mastered, remarkable outcomes can be achieved.
Jim faced immense difficulty communicating with his boss, their perspectives seemingly diverging in every aspect. This situation led Jim to minimize contact with his boss, Tom, to the greatest extent possible. Their meetings were always brief, formal affairs, confined to the boss's office. Jim aimed to endure this pain while keeping his job, despite feeling deeply unhappy and frustrated.
During one of our conversations, as Jim expressed his frustrations once again, he declared his willingness to do anything to address the situation. This was the opportune moment I had been waiting for. I explained to Jim that there were steps he could take, which might not immediately appear helpful, but if followed diligently, would lead to an improvement in his circumstances. It wasn't a panacea I offered, but a genuine chance for progress. Jim, putting aside his skepticism for the duration of my assistance, accepted the offer.
The first realization for Jim was the strategic disadvantage he faced by limiting their meetings to Tom's fortress-like office. It was the boss's sanctuary, where Jim was at his weakest. Jim vividly described the office—a massive high-backed chair positioned squarely to face the door, accompanied by a sizable desk. The walls are adorned with photographs of Tom alongside prominent individuals within and outside the company. A shelf showcased sports trophies and framed academic achievements, as well as certificates of appreciation and support from various social groups. Jim's feelings of intimidation and powerlessness upon entering this office were justified. He was venturing into a heavily garrisoned narrow pass.
Jim's first step towards improvement was acquiring knowledge. I loaned him a book by Alan Pease on body language. Alongside body language, the book explored subconscious power dynamics people engage in. Initially skeptical, I became a believer after testing some of Alan Pease's insights. Jim, too, needed to arm himself with this knowledge, as women are often more adept at using body language naturally. Men, therefore, should equip themselves by delving into books on the subject.
The subsequent step involved understanding Tom better and establishing a more positive foundation for their encounters. Although Tom's office served as a garrisoned narrow pass, it also represented a vulnerability that Jim could exploit. The office offered a wealth of information about Tom, which Jim could leverage to his advantage. The strategy called for Jim to arrange interactions with Tom outside the confines of his stronghold. Jim also needed less stressful encounters with his boss to foster a shift from a boss-employee dynamic to two individuals collaborating as equals.
Tactically, Jim had to maneuver Tom onto more neutral ground, away from the fortified castle. He also needed to engage in interactions with Tom that involved more than just the two of them. The lunchroom emerged as the chosen venue. This plan entailed Tom and Jim engaging in non-work-related conversations, fostering a deeper understanding and connection between them. Jim began to have his lunches at overlapping times with Tom's, quietly enjoying his meal while attentively listening to the conversations and getting to know his boss better. During one such interaction, Jim discovered that Tom was struggling to find someone to take charge of the social club's fundraising and event planning. Waiting for a week, Jim then approached Tom, expressing his willingness to assume the responsibility. Jim had learned that Tom highly valued those who undertook additional non-work-related tasks. By gathering insights about his "enemy," Jim found an opening to improve his situation, applying himself thoughtfully to the opportunity.
By year's end, Jim had raised more money for the work social club than anyone could recall and successfully secured a popular restaurant for the year-end social gathering. Tom was genuinely impressed, and so were others. Jim's popularity soared, and as popular people often do, he became privy to a wealth of information. He learned not only about Tom but also about many others he worked with. While utilizing this knowledge, Jim exercised discretion and morality, employing it to solve or pre-empt potential problems. His remarkable abilities did not go unnoticed and rewarded him accordingly.
As both men gradually discovered more about each other, their relationship transformed for the better. Jim realized that Tom, as the boss, was often plagued by loneliness, yearning for light-hearted interactions with his colleagues. Jim became adept at sharing socially acceptable jokes and maintaining light-hearted conversations. Around two months into Jim's plan, he was taken aback when Tom invited him to a barbecue. Slowly but surely, they realized their commonalities and a genuine friendship began to blossom.
Over time, Jim learned several valuable lessons. Firstly, he discovered that he didn't know his "enemy" or himself as well as he assumed. Secondly, he recognized his lack of knowledge and preparedness, realizing he was ill-equipped for the challenges at hand. Lastly, he understood that he had been waging the wrong battle on an inappropriate battlefield. As the year progressed, he found that the better he connected with Tom, the less intimidated he felt during their meetings in the boss's office. Jim also discovered that Tom had never intended to create a garrisoned narrow pass or decorate his office to intimidate his colleagues. Instead, it was a reflection of Tom's quest for an optimal workspace to enhance his performance. Tom remained oblivious to the fact that his office intimidated others. Rather than directly attempting to change Tom's mindset, Jim realized that an indirect approach was more effective. As Tom grew to know Jim better, he sought his input and advice. Over the next year, both men achieved their goals—Tom accepted a promotion in another city, and Jim embraced a promotion to a different office.
Jim employed ideas from "The Art of War" and drew inspiration from Alan Pease's "Body Language" to attain his success. He now possesses a profound understanding of narrow passes and how to navigate them skilfully.
Jim faced a difficult relationship with his boss, Tom. Feeling frustrated and powerless, Jim seeks assistance in resolving the situation. Through guidance and strategic maneuvers, Jim learns how to navigate "narrow passes" — challenging circumstances that resemble fortified obstacles. He educates himself on body language, gains insights into Tom's character, and strategically interacts with him outside the confines of his intimidating office. Over time, Jim's understanding and connection with Tom deepen, leading to a transformation in their relationship. By the end, Jim not only resolves his conflicts with Tom but also earns recognition and achieves personal and professional growth.